Exclusivity 46

Exclusivity 46

Disclaimer:  I do not own the characters of Inuyasha.

~oOo~

Sesshoumaru stared quietly at the fire, lost in his thoughts, though he was quite well aware of his surroundings, and his pack's safety.  Especially one certain part of it...

It was thoughts of her, that had sent his mind into the past.

Unfortunately, most of his past, particularly the portions of his past that featured his parents, wasn't pleasant... and those things were were playing in his mind, as he worried over ending up like his father and mother – or at least, that Kagome would continue to fear such a thing.

"I should not be so surprised that you have chosen to take a lover, I suppose,"  his mother had said bitterly to his father.  "But now that you have, do not return to me.  I will not share, and if you wish to have her, then you will not have me."

He remembered his father's anger, and his mother's bitterness, the arguments that had occurred when his mother had refused to share a bed with him again since he'd taken a mistress.  He'd been stuck listening to it all, and neither had really noticed that he was there, too caught up in their fighting.

But he could never bring himself to forget... his father had not understood his wife's anger – after all, it was nothing surprising in that day and age for a male to have more than one female.  She would always be his wife, his mate, number one amongst any females he took, so why would she refuse his bed?

Despite the fact that he was enamored of Inuyasha's mother, he had still been more than attracted to his wife, and had expected her to accept his decision, as long as she did not lose her supremacy amongst the females.

That she had turned him away had shocked and angered him.  It hadn't occurred to him until far too late just why she had been so adamant that she would never accept him again after he'd taken another.

But Sesshoumaru had seen what his mother had felt, cold or not.  She still held emotions, and while he would never be close to her, still, he did not like to see her unhappy, either.  He'd held that against his father for a long time, in an abstract way.  It had also been why he'd decided that he, himself, had no desire to have a female.

Now, that was obviously by the wayside... and he couldn't help but think back to Kagome's concern about multiple wives.  He knew, from things he'd gathered from her, that such things were no longer done in her world – that, in fact, it was not even allowed, by law.  And he had no problem with that; he had already decided that he had no need for, nor desire for, another female.  One – Kagome - was more than enough.

With an almost inaudible sigh, he flicked a glance at her, watching the shadows and light from the fire play across her delicate features as she slept.  'And I could tell her that... but will she ever feel safe with just my words?  After all, in her mind, it is not beyond the realm of possibility that I will eventually change mine.  And there would be nothing she could do to stop me if I chose to do so – this is something that will definitely occur to her.  So how will I let her know... how can I pledge to her in a completely unbreakable way that I will not do such a thing to her?'

He knew that this very thing had been on her mind lately, though she'd not said a word.  But she had been thinking over his parents, and his brother, a great deal, and it wasn't hard to see what she feared.

'Perhaps... something along those lines should be my courting gift to her?  Is there something I could do to bind myself only to her, disallowing even the possibility of another?  A binding, a vow... of exclusivity...'

It was an interesting thought... and most fitting, as well.  Indeed, if he thought about it, he could understand her fear of such a thing – the thought of her with another was enough to make him want to destroy everything around him.  But he knew that with Kagome, it was not even a possibility she would ever accept another – she was the single most loyal person he'd ever come across, and Inu prized loyalty above all else.

Despite her humanity, Kagome was definitely a prize to an Inu.  She was loyal, loving, warm, beautiful, and a wonderful mother; it was as though the kami had made her specifically to be the mate of an inu.

'There is the distinct possibility that they did...'

His eyes traced her profile, relaxed and soft with sleep, and then came to her own eyes – he was a bit surprised to see that she had awakened and was watching him in return.  After a few moments of holding each others gazes, she sat up and moved closer to him, closer to the fire.  

"What's wrong, Sesshoumaru?"  she asked softly.

"There is nothing wrong, Kagome,"  he responded, just as quietly.  "I am merely thinking over certain conditions of the courting."

Smiling, she blushed as her eyes dropped demurely.  She rubbed her hands up and down her arms to quell the goosebumps the cool night air had given her, her short-sleeved sleeping attire not quite warm enough.  After a few moments, she sighed.  "I'm not worried about it.  You'll figure it out, whatever it is, and take care of it, no doubt."

Her absolute faith in him touched something deep within, and his expression softened a little as he looked at her.  "I will always take care of everything,"  he agreed, and from the widening of her smile, he knew she had understood his words.

No more was said, but Sesshoumaru's mind no longer focused on the past, and his parents.

Instead, it was focused on the here and now... and the woman he would take as his own.

The only one he would take... ever.

'Exclusivity.  Yes... I think it is the perfect thing to offer her as a courting gift – it would mean more to her than anything else. Somewhere in the world, there must be knowledge of how to bind oneself exclusively to another – all I must do is find it.'